Saturday, November 5, 2011
Friday, November 4, 2011
My new car...
So last Friday I bought a new car. Well, not new per-say, but new to me. It's a civic, in pretty great shape, and has a fresh coat of paint on it. . . or at least it did.
Today I left my car at work while we went out to dinner with the Boss Lady. R dropped me back off at my car a couple of hours later when I saw it. THE BIGGEST door-dink mark of life. You can quite literally see the entire length of the door that slammed into my precious, precious car. Not only is there a huge, foot long, mark on my car, but the paint is chipped off in several places.
I was (am) pissed. Super pissed. Beyond super pissed. Not just because they damaged my car that I have barely even owned for a whole week, but because they didn't even leave me an 'I'm sorry' note. It is NOT a small dent. Not by any stretch of the imagination. And I wasn't parked in a public lot, I was parked in the rear employees lot. This is a fact that really REALLY makes me mad. Because I know everyone who parks back there. It's someone I work with, someone who says hi to me every day, and they didn't even take two seconds to say 'oops, totally didn't mean to dent the side of your car in'.
So now, when I go into work on Monday I'm going to be eyeballing everyone I see. Wondering who was the braying jackass (who was clearly raised by wolves) that had the audacity to smash up the side of my car and just drive away.
Currently I feel like posting an open letter to said jackass on the side of my car above the dent. However, I think that might result in slashed tires.
People are rude. RUDE.
And they should be ashamed.
that.is.all.
Today I left my car at work while we went out to dinner with the Boss Lady. R dropped me back off at my car a couple of hours later when I saw it. THE BIGGEST door-dink mark of life. You can quite literally see the entire length of the door that slammed into my precious, precious car. Not only is there a huge, foot long, mark on my car, but the paint is chipped off in several places.
I was (am) pissed. Super pissed. Beyond super pissed. Not just because they damaged my car that I have barely even owned for a whole week, but because they didn't even leave me an 'I'm sorry' note. It is NOT a small dent. Not by any stretch of the imagination. And I wasn't parked in a public lot, I was parked in the rear employees lot. This is a fact that really REALLY makes me mad. Because I know everyone who parks back there. It's someone I work with, someone who says hi to me every day, and they didn't even take two seconds to say 'oops, totally didn't mean to dent the side of your car in'.
So now, when I go into work on Monday I'm going to be eyeballing everyone I see. Wondering who was the braying jackass (who was clearly raised by wolves) that had the audacity to smash up the side of my car and just drive away.
Currently I feel like posting an open letter to said jackass on the side of my car above the dent. However, I think that might result in slashed tires.
People are rude. RUDE.
And they should be ashamed.
that.is.all.
Boss Lady.
Oh Dear Friend, tonight R and I went out to dinner with the Boss Lady. She's not really our boss lady anymore, at least not technically, but she'll always be THE Boss Lady. It was fantastic. The best dinner ever. For a lot of reasons, really. But mostly because I miss her. And I'm glad she misses us back.
Whatever Boss Lady may be to everyone else, and whatever she may think she is to us, in my mind she'll always be my Other Mother. I never had a mom, not in any real sense of the word, but for five long years Boss Lady watched over me every day, for eight long, long hours. She scolded me when I was bad. Corrected me when I was wrong. Equipped me to do all kinds of things I didn't think that I would ever be able to do. She put up with my, at times unreasonable tantrums, saw me through the worst of my crazy. And after I tried (and failed...miserably) to kill myself, when no one else (except my dad) would even return my phone calls, she showed up at the ICU to make sure I was okay.
I don't know what she thinks about all this, or why she's taken care of me the way that she has, and really, I don't care. She did. And I'm a better person for having known her. Every day. I like the Boss Lady because she makes me better than I am. Even if she doesn't know it.
Boss Lady is my favorite.
I wish you had gotten a chance to meet her before you moved away...I don't know how exactly we would have accomplished that, but that's beside the point. She's been such a huge influence on Goose and I, without her ever really knowing it. When we get stuck, particularly when one of us is having issues at work, or with someone else, we try to figure out what Boss Lady would tell us to do. Plus, she plays the accordion. That in and of itself makes her pretty dang cool in my book.
Oh, and she secretly rocked out to Lady Gaga in the mornings. :)
Whatever Boss Lady may be to everyone else, and whatever she may think she is to us, in my mind she'll always be my Other Mother. I never had a mom, not in any real sense of the word, but for five long years Boss Lady watched over me every day, for eight long, long hours. She scolded me when I was bad. Corrected me when I was wrong. Equipped me to do all kinds of things I didn't think that I would ever be able to do. She put up with my, at times unreasonable tantrums, saw me through the worst of my crazy. And after I tried (and failed...miserably) to kill myself, when no one else (except my dad) would even return my phone calls, she showed up at the ICU to make sure I was okay.
I don't know what she thinks about all this, or why she's taken care of me the way that she has, and really, I don't care. She did. And I'm a better person for having known her. Every day. I like the Boss Lady because she makes me better than I am. Even if she doesn't know it.
Boss Lady is my favorite.
I wish you had gotten a chance to meet her before you moved away...I don't know how exactly we would have accomplished that, but that's beside the point. She's been such a huge influence on Goose and I, without her ever really knowing it. When we get stuck, particularly when one of us is having issues at work, or with someone else, we try to figure out what Boss Lady would tell us to do. Plus, she plays the accordion. That in and of itself makes her pretty dang cool in my book.
Oh, and she secretly rocked out to Lady Gaga in the mornings. :)
Thursday, November 3, 2011
Spellcheck
Before I go, Is it just me or does it seem like nobody gives a damn about spelling anymore? Spelling has always been my downfall. I'm terrible at it, admittedly. But with so many tools at my disposal it seems really...lazy to not even try to spell stuff right. (Besides that, if I'm the one noticing, you probably have a pretty serious problem).
And you know, social networking or personal blogs or whatever, I know I have to let that stuff go. But business emails? News articles?
What on earth is up with that?
I can't tell you how many online article I read that have grievous spelling and grammatical errors. Does nobody employ an editor anymore? Are things just published the way they are submitted? Does nobody care, to any small degree, how utterly stupid it makes them look to publish...anything with two spelling errors to every paragraph?
Makes me nutso.
Maybe it's just me, but it feels a lot like some sort of twisted devolution.
Maybe we'll just abandon the written word all together.
Maybe we'll all just go back to grunting.
It's hard to say.
Spellcheck.
Use it.
Love it.
And you know, social networking or personal blogs or whatever, I know I have to let that stuff go. But business emails? News articles?
What on earth is up with that?
I can't tell you how many online article I read that have grievous spelling and grammatical errors. Does nobody employ an editor anymore? Are things just published the way they are submitted? Does nobody care, to any small degree, how utterly stupid it makes them look to publish...anything with two spelling errors to every paragraph?
Makes me nutso.
Maybe it's just me, but it feels a lot like some sort of twisted devolution.
Maybe we'll just abandon the written word all together.
Maybe we'll all just go back to grunting.
It's hard to say.
Spellcheck.
Use it.
Love it.
Thursdays.
Somehow all the days just feel like Wednesdays.
It's official. I'm depressed. Not depressed-depressed. You know, not the failing-to-function, can't-wash-my-own-hair kind of depressed, but depressed nonetheless.
I don't feel overtly sad. I'm just apathetic. Apathetic and listless. About all things. Part of it is the month I've had. Part of it is the October blues, which in reality stretches out through most of the winter. Lightening a bit around T-day (probably not this year though), and clearing up for a bit around the first of the new year. Then before long comes the end of February melt-down which without fail arises out of the perfect storm created by the endless February/March flu, midterms, and a high census at work. How I survive all that, I'll never know. How I'm going to fare this year without my medication is yet to be seen. But, and I say this without trying to sound too much like Sylvia Plath via The Bell Jar, I'm hopeful.
Eh, well, if anyone can do it it's me.
Right about now I'm feeling a little bitter that my psychiatrist quit (even though it's been a year and a half now). And possibly more bitter that it's so hard to find one who's not an A-hole. But really I guess when you've had the same doc for as long as I have, they all seem like A-holes comparatively. Maybe it's an issue with standards. Maybe it has to do with my general disdain for change I do not initiate. Maybe it's something else all together. Who knows.
I think my boss is going to hire someone else to help out with the workload at work. I'm happy in theory. In practice, I'm worried because I know I'm not as adaptive as I need to be. Particularly because 1. I'm not in charge of the interviewing/hiring process and 2. I didn't ask for anyone else to be hired. Seems petty doesn't it? In the real world it's more complex with that. My fears over new people are colored by my experiences with other people I've worked with, both at this job and at others, and with the symbiotic relationship my co-worker and I have developed (don't know how we'll merge a third person into that, eep!). I know in the end, that I am working way too hard. That in reality the work load will crush me come February, but I'm resistant/anxious about the impending changes. I'm hoping if I stay aware of what I'm going through I'll be able to keep my head above water.
Also, I miss Goose.
Terribly.
I know it's probably the October blues or whatever, but right about now I really dislike how her and I are on opposite work schedules. Getting to see her one day a week blows chunks. This is a particularly pronounced problem this week since I have not attended any of my night classes and have way too much time on my hands. . . of course, by way too much time on my hands, I mean about two hours a night less than I need to get my homework done. But then we'd have to assume that I'm doing any of it right now, which I'm not. This further compounds my problems because it forces me to spend all day Saturday working on it, which is the only day I get with Goose, but you know how I can be when the procrastination/self-deprecation cycle starts up. :P
Ah, I don't know Dear Friend. Life is just generally icky.
But do you want to know something funny? (and totally unrelated to any part of this obnoxious rant?) Thought so.
Today I went to my morning class. It's super boring, which makes me sad because I both adore my professor, and expected I would really love this class. (Somehow the particle size of sediment just isn't doing it for me). Anyway, I have to write long hand in here to keep myself awake, and by writing, I really mean transcribing every single word that is said by anyone just to keep my brain focused. I got there a few minutes late, snuck in, set my bag down and it made the LOUDEST, most bizarre clunking sound ever.
Perplexed, I stared at my bag. What was in there? Why was this happening? I was sure I asked Goose to pack it for me this morning...what did she pack me?
The class stops briefly to stare at me.
When things go back to normal I quietly go to take out my notebook and start my notes. I unzip my bag...and it's full of hammers. HA! I thought it felt heavy and strangely packed. Goose forgot to re-pack it for me and it was still full of my fossiling gear. It was pretty funny. Less funny since I kept falling asleep in class, but still pretty dang funny.
I hope things today are better than they have been in your world. I want to call you, but I am in a for-real funk with nothing to say. Instead I just stare at the phone. Also, it's funny that you mentioned crossed lines in your post the other day because today I couldn't find my phone so I called it from Gooses phone, and it rang a couple of times and then was 'answered' by what sounded suspiciously like aliens. :) For serious though, that's what it sounded like. I'm sure it was a connection error that resulted in some really really weird electronic sounds, but it freaked Goose out pretty bad. She has an intense and irrational fear of all things alien and zombie. (Not that I continually exploit that....)
Well Dear Friend, I love you tons. Don't die up there amidst all the trees. Miss us some and we'll keep on missing you. Oh, and you know....come home soon. (Just had to throw that one in there). Lots of love.
Song of the day is one of Gooses favorite songs:
It's official. I'm depressed. Not depressed-depressed. You know, not the failing-to-function, can't-wash-my-own-hair kind of depressed, but depressed nonetheless.
I don't feel overtly sad. I'm just apathetic. Apathetic and listless. About all things. Part of it is the month I've had. Part of it is the October blues, which in reality stretches out through most of the winter. Lightening a bit around T-day (probably not this year though), and clearing up for a bit around the first of the new year. Then before long comes the end of February melt-down which without fail arises out of the perfect storm created by the endless February/March flu, midterms, and a high census at work. How I survive all that, I'll never know. How I'm going to fare this year without my medication is yet to be seen. But, and I say this without trying to sound too much like Sylvia Plath via The Bell Jar, I'm hopeful.
Eh, well, if anyone can do it it's me.
Right about now I'm feeling a little bitter that my psychiatrist quit (even though it's been a year and a half now). And possibly more bitter that it's so hard to find one who's not an A-hole. But really I guess when you've had the same doc for as long as I have, they all seem like A-holes comparatively. Maybe it's an issue with standards. Maybe it has to do with my general disdain for change I do not initiate. Maybe it's something else all together. Who knows.
I think my boss is going to hire someone else to help out with the workload at work. I'm happy in theory. In practice, I'm worried because I know I'm not as adaptive as I need to be. Particularly because 1. I'm not in charge of the interviewing/hiring process and 2. I didn't ask for anyone else to be hired. Seems petty doesn't it? In the real world it's more complex with that. My fears over new people are colored by my experiences with other people I've worked with, both at this job and at others, and with the symbiotic relationship my co-worker and I have developed (don't know how we'll merge a third person into that, eep!). I know in the end, that I am working way too hard. That in reality the work load will crush me come February, but I'm resistant/anxious about the impending changes. I'm hoping if I stay aware of what I'm going through I'll be able to keep my head above water.
Also, I miss Goose.
Terribly.
I know it's probably the October blues or whatever, but right about now I really dislike how her and I are on opposite work schedules. Getting to see her one day a week blows chunks. This is a particularly pronounced problem this week since I have not attended any of my night classes and have way too much time on my hands. . . of course, by way too much time on my hands, I mean about two hours a night less than I need to get my homework done. But then we'd have to assume that I'm doing any of it right now, which I'm not. This further compounds my problems because it forces me to spend all day Saturday working on it, which is the only day I get with Goose, but you know how I can be when the procrastination/self-deprecation cycle starts up. :P
Ah, I don't know Dear Friend. Life is just generally icky.
But do you want to know something funny? (and totally unrelated to any part of this obnoxious rant?) Thought so.
Today I went to my morning class. It's super boring, which makes me sad because I both adore my professor, and expected I would really love this class. (Somehow the particle size of sediment just isn't doing it for me). Anyway, I have to write long hand in here to keep myself awake, and by writing, I really mean transcribing every single word that is said by anyone just to keep my brain focused. I got there a few minutes late, snuck in, set my bag down and it made the LOUDEST, most bizarre clunking sound ever.
Perplexed, I stared at my bag. What was in there? Why was this happening? I was sure I asked Goose to pack it for me this morning...what did she pack me?
The class stops briefly to stare at me.
When things go back to normal I quietly go to take out my notebook and start my notes. I unzip my bag...and it's full of hammers. HA! I thought it felt heavy and strangely packed. Goose forgot to re-pack it for me and it was still full of my fossiling gear. It was pretty funny. Less funny since I kept falling asleep in class, but still pretty dang funny.
I hope things today are better than they have been in your world. I want to call you, but I am in a for-real funk with nothing to say. Instead I just stare at the phone. Also, it's funny that you mentioned crossed lines in your post the other day because today I couldn't find my phone so I called it from Gooses phone, and it rang a couple of times and then was 'answered' by what sounded suspiciously like aliens. :) For serious though, that's what it sounded like. I'm sure it was a connection error that resulted in some really really weird electronic sounds, but it freaked Goose out pretty bad. She has an intense and irrational fear of all things alien and zombie. (Not that I continually exploit that....)
Well Dear Friend, I love you tons. Don't die up there amidst all the trees. Miss us some and we'll keep on missing you. Oh, and you know....come home soon. (Just had to throw that one in there). Lots of love.
Song of the day is one of Gooses favorite songs:
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
On the menu tonight...
Humble pie, with a side of crow.
Only problem is, it should be in front of someone else.
There are many things in this world that I dislike doing. One of them is getting scolded for other peoples mistakes. Worse still, is having to eat a big ol' slice of that other person's humble pie. Especially if they're sitting across the table, grinning at you. That's pretty much been the theme of this week.
This month really.
For both of us.
Seems that everywhere Goose and I turn, someone has screwed something up, something that can't be proven, and blamed us.
Now, don't get me wrong, we screw up all the time...at least I know I do. There's no shame in making mistakes, even big ones. So why on earth do people have such a hard time with it, and in turn, put so much energy into blaming other people? I just don't get it.
It's not that I usually take these things lying down. I don't. I'm a real pain in the ass sometimes, and will continue to press the issue until it's been resolved CORRECTLY. With the correct people taking responsibility.
Sometimes though, that's not an option.
Do you remember that issue of The Wonder Years where Mr. Arnold gets the new boss who's an a-hole? The one who is totally unreasonable and yelling at him for no reason and Mr. Arnold just keeps replying 'Whatever you say, Ken'? Well Kevin doesn't get it. Thinks his dad is an idiot for putting up with all of it, then gets a job as a caddy and realizes sometimes you've just got to put up with unreasonable people, accept defeat in battles you weren't even fighting in, and admit fault for things you had nothing to do with.
Today we were both Kevin. It hit us like a 15,000lb sack of bricks, and neither of us liked it very much. There's this really weird point in life, where you really really really get all that crap about choosing your battles...and what exactly Dad means when he says 'it's just business'. Its unsettling. Strangely soul crushing. And I think the revelation itself may have aged me 15 or 20 years.
I miss the days, really miss them, when I had the luxury of being able to tell my boss/professor/neighbor/whoever to f-off. When right was right and wrong was wrong and I was in a position where I didn't have to accept anything in between. Where walking away from anything and everything was still 'totally reasonable', at least in my mind.
Being a grown-up, it sucks. Life is really all in-betweens. It's all politicking, networking, ladder climbing. It's meeting about nothing, endless memos and golf on Sundays. It's one big freaking campaign commercial and no one realizes or cares that one who throws mud inevitably gets hit with it too. Worse yet, no matter how much I don't want to play, real world economics dictate, at least for today, that we - Goose and I - bow to the system.
I don't know Dear Friend, I don't know. Seems that this past year has been particularly unkind to you and I . . . possibly to the world at large. . .
As T-Day approaches, and I face my first batch of holidays in recent memory without you and QD, I can't help but think that maybe, just maybe, we're not out of the woods quite yet.
Only problem is, it should be in front of someone else.
There are many things in this world that I dislike doing. One of them is getting scolded for other peoples mistakes. Worse still, is having to eat a big ol' slice of that other person's humble pie. Especially if they're sitting across the table, grinning at you. That's pretty much been the theme of this week.
This month really.
For both of us.
Seems that everywhere Goose and I turn, someone has screwed something up, something that can't be proven, and blamed us.
Now, don't get me wrong, we screw up all the time...at least I know I do. There's no shame in making mistakes, even big ones. So why on earth do people have such a hard time with it, and in turn, put so much energy into blaming other people? I just don't get it.
It's not that I usually take these things lying down. I don't. I'm a real pain in the ass sometimes, and will continue to press the issue until it's been resolved CORRECTLY. With the correct people taking responsibility.
Sometimes though, that's not an option.
Do you remember that issue of The Wonder Years where Mr. Arnold gets the new boss who's an a-hole? The one who is totally unreasonable and yelling at him for no reason and Mr. Arnold just keeps replying 'Whatever you say, Ken'? Well Kevin doesn't get it. Thinks his dad is an idiot for putting up with all of it, then gets a job as a caddy and realizes sometimes you've just got to put up with unreasonable people, accept defeat in battles you weren't even fighting in, and admit fault for things you had nothing to do with.
Today we were both Kevin. It hit us like a 15,000lb sack of bricks, and neither of us liked it very much. There's this really weird point in life, where you really really really get all that crap about choosing your battles...and what exactly Dad means when he says 'it's just business'. Its unsettling. Strangely soul crushing. And I think the revelation itself may have aged me 15 or 20 years.
I miss the days, really miss them, when I had the luxury of being able to tell my boss/professor/neighbor/whoever to f-off. When right was right and wrong was wrong and I was in a position where I didn't have to accept anything in between. Where walking away from anything and everything was still 'totally reasonable', at least in my mind.
Being a grown-up, it sucks. Life is really all in-betweens. It's all politicking, networking, ladder climbing. It's meeting about nothing, endless memos and golf on Sundays. It's one big freaking campaign commercial and no one realizes or cares that one who throws mud inevitably gets hit with it too. Worse yet, no matter how much I don't want to play, real world economics dictate, at least for today, that we - Goose and I - bow to the system.
I don't know Dear Friend, I don't know. Seems that this past year has been particularly unkind to you and I . . . possibly to the world at large. . .
As T-Day approaches, and I face my first batch of holidays in recent memory without you and QD, I can't help but think that maybe, just maybe, we're not out of the woods quite yet.
Wednesday, wednesday.
Oh Dear Friend. So many things have happened, and yet I somehow have nothing to talk about.
I did, however, submit an exam via safeassign earlier this week. Today I checked out my originality report. The first hit on it was 'from another student's paper' and was the material in the heading (My name / class number / Exam 1). I was pretty amused. Glad this safe assign thing is catching the plagerists. ;)
Lots of love.
I did, however, submit an exam via safeassign earlier this week. Today I checked out my originality report. The first hit on it was 'from another student's paper' and was the material in the heading (My name / class number / Exam 1). I was pretty amused. Glad this safe assign thing is catching the plagerists. ;)
Lots of love.
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