Merry Christmas!

I miss you furiously.

It seems so totally and completely unfair, the state of things. Having to pass holidays without such critical players in your life. My family looks at me like I'm mostly crazy when I mumble quietly to myself about your absence. Like the situation wasn't, and hasn't continued to be totally fucked up on at least some levels.

But I suppose that's to be expected.

I never was, WE never were, for that matter, the kind of people who half-ass things. Obsessive friendships included. All heart and total disdain for the realm of social norms.

Christmas here was lovely. We did our thing last night, on Christmas Eve since Sister and Little B have multiple families to visit with today. We had a low-key affair. All finger foods and hanging out on the couch. No big dinner or fancy dress, which made me happy. It was one of (if not the) best holiday we've had as a family. I'd go into more detail, but there's not a lot to say. We just hung out and passed the time. We opened some gifts and ate some food, and all things were lovely.


This morning I woke up and all I wanted was a fried egg sandwich. I wanted it REALLY bad. But alas, I had no eggs, since I so rarely eat them (I have textural issues with eggs a lot of the time...*shudder*), and the grocery store was not open. I debated driving around to see if some sort of fast food place was open, but decided if I put that kind of energy into the quest for food and then failed my day MIGHT be ruined. Instead I took a bath and watched some Ugly Americans.

Now, mostly clean, (I somehow neglected to wash my hair...) I'm taking a bottle of sparkling cider, a bag full of TOC's top-secret-family-recipe cookies, and my hula hoop up the mountain. Which mountain, I haven't really decided. :P But I'm confident I'll know the right one when I've reached it.

I miss you more than life. I miss our holiday feasting, and I'm sad you're not here. One day, however, I'm confident we'll be able to resume our little holiday rituals and all will be right in the world.

Sending you all my love.
Me.