Still Awake.

I'm still awake, Dear Friend. I can't find my phone, I think I must have left it in the car, but I just can't bring myself to get dressed again to go check. It's so warm in here, and so cold out there.

Anyway, if you've called and I've neglected you I'm super sorry. :( But I love you lots.

All that coffee may have been a bad plan.

By midnight I was reconsidering my plan to stay awake for the next 48 hours. I should have listened to you. Obviously you were right, this has doom written all over it.

I tried to lay down and get some rest, if not sleep, but there was WAY too much caffeine in my system. I was restless. My joints ached. My heart was racing. I was vaguely nauseous, and not at all tired.

My brain just kept going, trying to figure out ways to get me to sleep.

At some point I convinced myself I should probably go drink a bunch of water and puke it back up, just as a precautionary measure. You know, to wash out any remaining coffee residue. That way I don't find myself even more awake at some point in the future.

Well, I set that plan into motion and immediately regretted it. It seems I lost sight of exactly how much I hate throwing up, right up until I found myself past the point of no return.

Unpleasant physical aspects of vomiting aside, it seems I forgot exactly how efficient the stomach is at processing liquids, as it had been more than 4 hours since my last pot of coffee and my stomach was mostly devoid of any remaining liquid remnants. It was however, still full of my rather heavy steak and potatoes dinner, which I apparently was so excited about that I failed to chew it properly. It is incredibly disturbing to regurgitate food six or so hours later and still be able to identify different food items.

As I stared at my dinner, revisited, I began to worry that I had already processed all the coffee, and as such had only managed to deprive my body of my dinner, which it clearly needed. I got up, took a multi-vitamin and made myself a second dinner. This DID make me feel better. Both the nausea and rapid heart rate have dissipated, but the achy joints and general restlessness remain.

So now here I am, at 1:30 in the morning, still awake, and still not even vaguely interested in studying for the biostats final awaiting me in the morning.

That being said, I AM going to attempt to get some rest now. I don't expect it to go well, but I am going to try.

I love you tons. Tons and tons, and I wish you were here. Tuesday is my last day of classes, and I intend to come home and pass out for at least 14 hours. After that I'm all yours.

Lots of love,
me.